Living near the shore, I am especially tuned into the ebbs and flows of the tide. Recently, I attended several life celebrations, the ebbs and flows of life: two deaths and a wedding, all for friends in the third chapter of their lives.

Perhaps the saddest was a 65 year old family member whose 18 month struggle with ovarian cancer came to an end. She had many reasons to continue living, but genetics and bad luck prevailed. She had a green burial, the first I’ve attended, which meant no embalming with chemicals and a biodegradable bamboo casket. Heavy with sorrow at the loss of this kind, wise and funny women, family and close friends gathered next to the cherry tree that would mark her grave and set her spirit free. My sister wrote and orchestrated a memorable celebration of her partner’s life. Although a very sad occasion, it was a reminder of how this woman created opportunities for her others, did good and touched many in her life. Her final words were to remind us about the importance of kindness. It is a valuable reminder to all she left behind in today’s polarized world.

The other life ebb celebration occurred in Italy, a UK colleague who I knew from my work in Palestine. His memorial took place at his home in Umbria. Outside his Italian home which was attached to an 11th century church, we gazed over the rolling hills, a horse grazing in the nearby field. The sky was dotted with puffy clouds and the late afternoon sun cast golden light on those who gathered. Family and colleagues spoke of all he had done. A physician, a researcher, a “pathological collaborator” (as he sometimes referred to himself), who had vision and the ability to gather people and rally them to his cause. He was born a Jew, lost his grandparents in the Holocaust, and yet worked to strengthen Family Medicine in Palestine and to foster peace between Palestine and Israel. For me, it was healing to travel the distance and spend a few days walking in the hills of Umbria, beginning in Montefalco and ending up in Assisi, before we commemorated his efforts to make a difference in our troubled world.

My final celebration is this coming weekend, the wedding of a longtime single friend who is getting married at age 69 having met the partner of her dreams on a cruise. She will begin a transcontinental marriage between Wisconsin and Australia. I will celebrate her joy in finding a companion to walk with through the inevitable ebbs and flows of a life, especially during the final chapters.

While their is much to mourn in our current war torn world, one thing my Palestinian colleagues have taught me is the importance of taking the time to celebrate. Whether it be a funeral, a birthday, a holy day, or a wedding, and in spite of the trauma happening around them, I have watched them put aside their many worries to treasure the important moments in their families and communities’ lives.

I am blessed. You are blessed. May we both take the time to count our many blessings.